The first 20 weeks and our miracle baby....

You always hear a picture is worth a thousand words. I can now testify to that. Seeing those three tiny, beating blobs on the screen left me speechless. That ER doctor wasn't crazy after all! I was really carrying three babies. As soon as we found out, my doctor took me into her office and basically told me I was too high-risk for them to see and they would refer me to a group of specialists. She told me of all the hardships I would probably endure over the next several months- sickness, dehydration, strict bed rest very early on, premature birth- to name a few and basically bid us farewell. We left the office feeling scared of the unknown, but after seeing our babies, we felt excited. The next week I was hospitalized for five days because I did become extremely dehyrated, but after countless bags of IVs and a breakfast, lunch and dinner of toast and applesauce, I got to go home. I was still working full time, but the majority of my days were spent in the bathroom and it was anything but pretty. I made my first appointment with my new group of specialists and my mom went with me to that appointment because we knew Mike needed to save up as much vacation/sick time as possible. At this visit, the doctor took us into her office and basically told us the human body is not meant to carry three babies. If I would reduce down to two, it would give both of the remaining babies a much better chance. If I kept all three, I risked all three. I told her apparently my body didn't get that memo and we did not need to continue this conversation any further. She then told us not to start shopping for the babies until I was atleast 24 weeks along and that was that. I should have known in that moment, with the way she basically encouraged me to do a selective reduction, that this doctors group would be the main test of my own strength over the next several months. I would not have a doctor to lean on for understanding and support...so much for these so called specialists! Over the next several weeks I went to appointment after appointment, having a sonogram each time, and all seemed to be going well. Around the 15th week, I went to my appointment by myself (the one and only time) as Mike had to work and my mom was sick. During this sonogram, the tech said she didn't like the fluid levels around Baby "C" and was calling the doctor in. Each baby needed atleast 4cm of fluid and she had 1/2 of 1 centimeter. She also had reverse blood flow which was another major concern. They immediately decided to call a world renown surgeon in Miami to make me an appointment to go see him. She told me he would do one of three things- he would say just wait and see, he would laser her cord in hopes of strengthening it and improving the blood flow, or he would tie her cord off, meaning she would die. The doctor then asked me to go wait in a room while she called to make my appointment. A few minutes later she comes in and says to me, "They will be calling you with your appointment time this afternoon. Getting in with this doctor is like finding a needle in a haystack. When they say go, drop whatever you are doing, and go. However, my gut feeling is that they will choose to tie that cord off." And she then left the room. I felt like I had been punched in the stomach, how dare this woman say that to me, then just leave the room not letting me ask any questions, and act like this was no big deal. This was a human life....MY baby's life!! I decided in that moment I would not let this cold, heartless doctor see me cry because of her and her "gut feelings" so I sucked it up, marched right past her, down the four floors of the doctors office, out to the parking garage, and when I was finally in my car, I lost it. Why would God give me these three babies just to take one away?? I would have to see that precious baby's body, frozen at 15 weeks, every time I had a sonogram. I finally calmed down enough to drive home and when I told Mike and my mom the news, I made it sound better than what it really was, that there was just some concern for her and we would see what happens. That appointment was on a Friday afternoon and on Monday at noon, I still hadn't heard from anybody. I called my doctors to see what the plan was and the doctor's assistant said to me, "Oh, the doctor in Miami said you don't meet the criteria to go down to Miami right now. If you have questions, ask at your next appointment." I just didn't understand. Three days ago you tell me my baby would most likely die and now I don't even meet criteria?? My next appointment comes and I ask the sonogram tech what is going on and she tells me that for the doctor in Miami to even see me, I have to meet very specific criteria. My baby had to be in the 10th percentile or less, she was in the tenth percentile in all areas but one, and in that one area she was in the twelfth. The tech said she used to work for this doctor and had seen many cases like this and she wanted to warn me, it normally went downhill very quickly and I should be ready to go down there soon. If Baby "C" got to where she met criteria and we did nothing and she ended up dying on her own, there was a 30-40% chance that Baby "B", her identical, would have brain damage. Every single sonogram after this was beyond nerve-racking. I felt sick every time she got to Baby " C". However, this little girl wasn't going down without a fight (kind of how she was at bedtime last night!) and each week she miraculously got more fluid and less reversed blood flows. The sonogram tech, who was the only bright spot in that horrible doctors office, said around 20 weeks, " I think she's going to hold her own. I have never seen this before, it usually gets real bad, real fast, but she is actually improving." I truly believe it was the power of prayer and God's amazing grace that saved our little girl's life. I want to thank each and everyone of you who prayed for us. She was on more prayer lists than I probably even realize. It was a scary time, with none of us knowing for awhile what would happen. But, as you all know now, my little girl is happy, healthy and perfect. Our little fighter- Makayla Grace. Now, who thinks I should send that ignorant doctor a picture of her and write, " Here's your gut feeling!!"??

Makayla Grace